Tag Archives: lyrics

Beer Drinking and Deep Thinking

I sit with my deep thoughts while I’m drinking.
No need for any friends to interrupt.
A pop top on a beer can starts me thinking—
Like what went down and now what is up?

A beer can change your mind if you let it.
Two beers can erase a joyless frown.
Three beers can often help forget it.
(1) Four can make you howl like a hound.
(2) Four makes everything go out of round.
(3) Four can make it easy to fall down.

Sometimes I have a beer and sit, just thinking.
I often think deeper most the day.
I think about life and how I end up blinking
At how it all turned out this-a-way.

If you don’t think it through on the first one
A second or a third may help a bit
By 4 or 5 or 6 you’re having some fun
By 7 you’re just a drunken shit.

Refrain

I’ve found there is truth in a beer can
But it takes a lot of time to get it out.
You can’t chug a thought like a keg stand.
You have to sit and struggle with the doubt.

Did I do the things that I shoulda ought to?
Or did I just waste a lot of days?
If I could get to do all this stuff over
Would I just end up old anyway?

[89]

My Corona

 

See, the thing is, Weird Al said not to do this and I’m not even the first. But here’s my version…and a link to the original.  But feel free to sing along with my lyrics below. Very 13 year old boy brain stuff.

 

UPDATE: Friend, Ken Cormier, honored me with this: Please listen.

Oh my little bitty one, bitty bug.
Are you gonna live in some grime, Corona?
Ooh, you make my sneezer run, my sneezer run.
Blow a Kleenex full of slime, Corona
Never gonna stop, give it up.
Such a dirty hand. Always get it up for the touch
of the viral kind. My my my i yi woo.
M M M My Corona

Come a little closer, huh, ah will ya, huh.
Close enough to sneeze in my eyes, Corona.
Keeping you so far away gets to me
Licking down the length my fries, Corona.
Never gonna stop, give it up. Such a dirty hand.
Always get it up for the touch
of the virus guys. My my my i yi woo.
M M M My Corona
M M M My Corona

When you gonna give it to me, give it to me?
It is just a matter of time, Corona
?
Is it just destiny, destiny?
Or is it just a game in my mind, Corona?
Never gonna stop, give it up.
Such a dirty hand. Always get it up for the touch
of the viral kind. My my my i yi woo.
My my my i yi woo.
M M M My Corona
M M M My Corona
M M M My Corona
M M M My Corona

(Apologies to The Knack)

Draining the Swamp

Sent a crocodile to Washington.
They sent that croc back to me.
They said, he can’t get along with anyone.
Sadly, that’s a fact, although he’s a she.

I should have sent my alligator
To chew through the hullabaloo,
‘Cuz a crock just hasn’t a clue
What a real live swampy gator can do.

So I sent them back a gator,
A big ol’ boy to boot.
Made him carry a crock-skin briefcase
While wearing a shark skin suit.

He was supposed to take your retirement
And turn it into a fortune.
Instead he pocketed the cash
And landed a round house on your chin.

He sold us out for a private island
And a cabana made of bamboo.
Turns out a man just hasn’t a clue
What a real live swampy gator will do.

So I just stay out of Washington now.
The dialogue’s been getting hotter.
Some say its the death of civility.
I think it’s something in the water.