I wanted to see what AI could do in terms of writing a song. Here is the prompt and the result. (The first one is AI. The second one is me. It’s probably a tie.)

Prompt: Write a classic rock song about a retiree’s narrow life in a universe that expands infinitely.

Verse 1:
Woke up one morning, feeling so darn old
Got aches in my bones, my story’s been told
Been livin’ life in the slow lane, same old song
Watching the world fly by, feels like I don’t belong

Chorus:
In a universe that’s ever expanding
My life seems so narrow, suffocating
Gotta find a way to break free, to fly
Before my time’s up and the whole world passes by

Verse 2:
I’ve been stuck in this rut for far too long
Wasting my days in a routine floatin’ on
But the universe out there is vast and grand
And life’s too short not to make a stand

Chorus:

Bridge:
I may be getting old, but my spirit’s still young
With the fire in my soul, I can’t be outdone
Gonna take that leap of faith, spread my wings and fly
In the face of a universe that refuses to die

Chorus:

Then I watched Monty Python’s video The Galaxy Song and this happened.

Banging and Crunching
(Since You’ve Been Gone)


Verse:
I’m a 73 year old retiree.
I spend my day primarily making tea (and pee)
Though there’s no one here with whom I converse,
I’m the center of the expanding universe.
We’re a hundred miles apart since that day
Three years ago when you went away, (far away)
Like drinking good cognac,and hiking up a track,
Getting gone takes less time than getting back.(that’s a fact)

Bridge:
The math is undeniable, Sweetheart.
Since you left we’ve drifted far too far apart

Verse:
Einstein’s Relativity cleared the path.
Hubble marked the signposts in his math. (so much math)
It’s not that everything flies away.
It’s the space itself expanding every way.
From right to left to up to down to back
You are speeding out away into the black.
From my front to to your front, however, dear,
A red shift is apparent, seen from here. (It’s clear.)

Bridge:
My only hope is to see the start of the Big Crunch
In a 100 million years or so we can shout and wave a bunch

Verse:
I’ve done some calculations on the cuff (off the cuff!)
To see if this distance is enough
At 42 miles a second per megaparsec,
And under this much gravity—double check— (what the heck)
The father away, the faster you recede
The longer gone, the greater is your speed.
Like raisins in the rising raisin dough,
We’re sitting still all while we’re on the go. (Sooooooooo)

Bridge:
I’m rooting for the Big Crunch I’ll wait right here for you
And in a billion years or so, you’ll be right here with me too.
Until the Big Crunch I’ll wait right here for you
And in a billion years or so, you’ll be right here with me too.

(90)